Regretful Regrets

Now I know I have previously posted that you should lie to spare a bride's feelings as to why you will not make it to her wedding. Recent circumstances have made me come to the realization that an amendment to that rule is needed.

Only lie if there is no way the bride will find out that you lied.

Example: A couple told us they would not make it to our wedding as they would not be able to travel with their baby. We totally understood and were not upset in the least bit. So this morning, as I'm checking the blogs I frequent, I see that they posted a gallery of travel photos of their last trip which above mentioned baby joined them on. Not only did they travel with the baby, they traveled cross country, actually made a pit stop in the middle and then gushed about what a good traveler their baby is. Now my fiancee and I are not upset about this and are finding it rather comical really. But seriously, if your going to lie, don't put a post on your family blog, or facebook, or family newsletter that indicates you were clearly lying. It's best to start off with an iron proof lie that it will be really hard for you to get caught in.

Let's Give Them Something to Talk About

For many people, talking about the books they read makes it an even more enjoyable past time. Here is the book I have up for reading next on my list. What are you reading?

Nicholas Kristof
Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide

Books generally seem to be a good conversation topic and everyone appreciates receiving a good book recommendation.

Meeting someone ... again...

As I've mentioned, I am getting married in just a few weeks. At my shower this past Sunday, my aunt, who has met my oldest and dearest friend several times, didn't remember her and didn't even bother to pretend to remember her after being informed they have met several times.

Now when this happens to me, I always pretend like I remember meeting them afterall (even if I don't). I always feel like this is the polite (and kind) thing to do. What do you think dear readers?

What is appropriate to say to a BRIDE?

As I am getting married in just a few weeks, I find myself really wondering on what planet do people thing it is acceptable to say the things they are saying to me. I have compiled a brief list of things it is never acceptable to ask (or tell) a BRIDE.

1. A criticism of any aspect of her big day. It is her special day, has nothing to do with you, and really whatever is irritating you doesn't matter. As I like to say, JUST SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE!
2. She should do ..... Again, it is her day, she should do what she wants. You don't know what her personal situation, don't make her feel like she needs to do things she can't afford, or doesn't have time to do, or in the case of crafts - just doesn't have the talent for.
3. Is there an open bar? Seriously - are you not gonna come if you can't get drunk?
4. I'm not coming (with no explanation of why). She cared enough to invite you. Care enough to make up some good excuse worthy of missing this special occassion.
5. Is your fiancee nervous about getting married? Someone really asked me this. There is no way to ask this question without implying there is something wrong with the BRIDE that would scare the groom. For the record, my fiancee can't wait to be married. I was just joking about pressuring him people!

Inaugural Post

Today, like many other days, I found myself in the position of having breached what I would consider the standards of customary interactions with other people. In these cases, I always wonder what I should have done differently or what would have been appropriate, and mostly why didn't I just shut my pie hole.

In order to document my efforts to become a more graceful individual, I have started this blog to answer the questions that plague my mind. Sometimes I don't know how to handle a difficult person, sometimes I question if it is really necessary to butter one bite of bread at a time, and sometimes I search for the appropriate thing to say to an individual who has just experienced a tragedy.

Hopefully, I will find likeminded readers who are also wrestling the etiquette/interpersonal issues we are all facing as technology and societal changes influence contemporary life.